Boston Burger Company is not the kind of place you go to order a plain burger. When you visit one of the Massachusetts chain’s three outposts, you order a Mac Attack, or a Porkasaurus, or something aptly named The Hot Mess. They’re a handful of the 30-plus options so off-the-wall, you’d be remiss to order just a burger.
There’s no ideal way to tackle the menu, though, when toppings like special sauce, onion rings, and homemade mac and cheese dot every listing. You’ve got to go with your heart — which should lead you to the Artery Clogger. It’s arguably as basic as Boston Burger Company gets (just cheese, bacon, and barbecue sauce on top), except for one major thing: The entire patty is beer-battered and deep-fried.
Don’t be fooled by the look of it: At first glance, it seems like your beef was swapped for some veggie-friendly patty or a turkey burger. But the red meat’s there; it’s just hiding under a light-colored coat of fried goodness. And as is tradition for every burger on the menu, this one’s served open-faced. Chefs initially served all of them steakhouse-style, with the bun closed and a knife through the middle, but fans revolted. Their burgers didn’t look as good on Instagram when they couldn’t see the star ingredients.
Luckily, the top-bun-left-behind tactic also assuages you of your guilt when you tackle your order with a fork and knife instead of biting into the thing. Some of the burgers tower so high, it’d be impossible to anyway. The Pigferno comes stacked with a volcano of pulled pork, onion rings, spicy mayo, and habanero salsa. You couldn’t fit your mouth around it if you tried. The same goes for the 420 Burger — a stoner-friendly combo of mozzarella sticks, fried mac and cheese, onion rings, French fries, and bacon — and the Kitchen Sink, which is piled with ham, bacon, peppers, mushrooms, onions, three cheeses, and a fried egg.
If you don’t have plans to hit up Bean Town anytime soon, consider Boston Burger Company’s Burga Box. The meal kits are shipped all over the country, and designed to let you build some of the restaurant’s biggest hits in your own home. A word to the wise: Just throw away the box before you try to pass one off as your own creation.